Saturday, August 11, 2012

Avoiding war in divorce is as simple as avoiding war with your neighbor

As a divorce lawyer for the past 17 years, I get to meet and speak to dozens of people every week regarding their relationships and the problems they encounter in their marriages. Having counseled thousands of people, I am privy to both the underbelly of marriage and divorce. In the same way that people get married by choice, they make a choice about the tone of their divorce.

Avoiding war in divorce is as simple as avoiding war with your neighbor. It is complex, but at the same time achievable. I always ask my clients to reflect on the following five questions before deciding on a strategy in their divorce:

Top five things men should not do when going through a divorce

In divorce, it's commonly assumed that the soon-to-be ex-husband will get the short end of the stick in the divorce settlement -- whether it's losing the house or full child custody while also getting stuck with alimony and child support payments.

But men have just as much of a right to win in a divorce settlement as women do. So what men need to remember is that their behavior and actions during divorce are incredibly important. You don't want your actions to shift the favorability in the court to your spouse.

Here are the top five things men should not do when going through a divorce.

Some very basics tips, but certainly worth doing, especially not moving out of the home.